Trump’s first 100 daze, a retrospective

Trump’s first 100 days have been like drinking water through a firehose. The left barely has time to get their talking points together — and George Soros time to print his paid protesters’ signs for them — before Trump is on to something else.

Here are a few random thoughts I have not had enough time to write a full column on, looking back on Trump’s first 100 days:

• Democrats complain that Trump divides. AOC has been on a paid speaking tour saying, “There is too much division in this country.” At her level this is true; subtraction and addition are hard enough. 
• Melding MAGA’s anti-DEI and RFK Jr’s MAHA, the administration will likely ban or deport all Fruit Loops of color.
• The Pope died. He was lauded for being a simple man who gave men hope. He moved out of his palatial Vatican apartments to live in a one-bedroom studio and drove an old, beat-up, compact car. It made all of us recently divorced guys feel that we, too, could be a Pope.
• Trump attended the funeral of the recently deceased Pope. Some got mad at a meme where he trolled the left that he should be named Pope. The “humble” Pope was said to be very popular; thousands lined the streets of Rome for his funeral procession. There are 1.7 billion Catholics in the world, so if you think about it, thousands coming out to see his funeral is not such a great turnout.
• Joe Biden came to the funeral. When he walked into the Cathedral he asked, “whose wedding is this?”
• Barack Obama was at the funeral too. He and the pope did not get along; neither liked the other’s holier-than-thou attitude. 
• Trump raised tariffs on China. Then when China raised them on us, Trump raised them again. I guess it is true. You eat Chinese tariffs and just an hour later you are hungry for more.
• Two of the first countries to have big tariffs put on them are Cambodia and Vietnam. Between tariffs and ICE deportations, the Asian massage parlor business is declining. The “ladies” working there must publish a disclaimer that they can only “love you short time” now. 
• Washington announced that the NFL draft would be held in D.C. This followed the 160^th anniversary of the ending of the Civil War. Dems celebrated by putting on a play in Ford’s Theater. They extended an olive branch to Trump, inviting him to sit in the balcony next to Alec Baldwin.
• To the whiny consternation of the left, Tiger Woods and Shaquon Barkley played rounds of golf with Trump. Look, I would play golf with any living ex-president, no matter what his/her Party. If the last Democratic president wanted me to play a round of golf, I’d say “Great, where do you want to play, Dr. Jill?”
• Egg and gas prices have fallen under Trump. The court system has gotten so political that a D.C. district court ordered egg and gas prices to go back to where they were.
• Trump and his team push back against stupid partisan media questions. Lefties Joy Reid, Lester Holt, Jim Acosta, Hoda Kotb, Andrea Mitchell, Chuck Todd, Norah O’Donnell and the like retired or were fired. I guess Rachel Maddow is the last man standing.
• Trump’s plan was to get oil prices down with “Drill, Baby, Drill.” For eggs he said, “Lay Baby, Lay.” (A slogan, which could also be used for his incentive to increase birthrates in America.) To get more babies Trump is said to want to give money to those pregnant. He should fund free booze; that has done more to increase pregnancies than any government program.
• In her speaking tour, AOC makes the case for a Democrat in the White House in 2028 (implying that it should be her). And she may be right; by then the country will be rocking and rolling and we will need a bartender in the White House.
• Trump suggested reopening Alcatraz prison. All prisoners would get free food, free healthcare, free sexual reassignment surgeries, wouldn’t have to work or obey strict government rules, and would receive the assurance that everyone is treated equally on the taxpayer’s dime. Only official government guards would have guns. Californians should love that; it is emblematic of the culmination of Democrat policies.

Ron Hart is a libertarian op-ed humorist, award-winning author, and a frequent guest on TV. He can be contacted at Ron@RonaldHart.com or @RonaldHart on X.