Resentment brings out the worst in us
Remember when you were newly married? You loved doing whatever you could for your spouse. You found yourself humming while emptying the dishwasher, mowing the lawn, even scrubbing toilets.
Do you recall when you first started that new job? How you smiled as you pitched in because you were thrilled to be part of the team?
Now that time has passed, are you still humming? Still smiling? Or do you spend more time muttering and scowling? When people don’t sufficiently show their appreciation, most of us begin to feel used and taken advantage of.
Would you feel resentful if I told you 1 Corinthians 13:5 (ESV) says, “[Love is not] resentful”?
Maintaining a good attitude is hard when we don’t feel appreciated. We’re not asking for billboards to be erected in our honor, but a simple “thank you” now and then would be nice.
If we’re not careful, though, the more we dwell on feeling overlooked, the more we resent the very people we previously found joy with.
Resentment brings out the worst in us, causing us to think and behave in ways we’d never admit to. We might sabotage a coworker’s promotion by slandering his or her reputation. Or shame a family member by bringing up an unkind action from the past just to torment him or her. We know they don’t deserve our mean-spirited actions, but we’re so miserable that we want them to suffer too – especially if they’re receiving the praises and “attaboys” we crave.
What would happen if we completely shifted our mindset and refused to allow ourselves to feel like a martyr? Especially during this National Volunteer Appreciation Month, what if our highest desire was to honor God in all we do? And what if we gave those by whom we feel slighted the benefit of the doubt, at home and at work? They’re likely aware of how much we contribute and would miss us dearly if we were to leave. But, as we also do at times, they allow their distractingly busy schedules to keep them from expressing their gratitude.
As we allow God to change our motives and grow in our ability to love others, we’ll be quicker to overlook offenses, even when we feel slighted. And, miracle of miracles, we might even find ourselves spending less time muttering and scowling and more time humming and smiling.
Sheryl H. Boldt, a Franklin County resident, is the author of the blog, www.TodayCanBeDifferent.net. Connect with her at SherylHBoldt@gmail.com.
Meet the Editor
David Adlerstein, The Apalachicola Times’ digital editor, started with the news outlet in January 2002 as a reporter.
Prior to then, David Adlerstein began as a newspaperman with a small Boston weekly, after graduating magna cum laude from Brandeis University in Waltham, Massachusetts. He later edited the weekly Bellville Times, and as business reporter for the daily Marion Star, both not far from his hometown of Columbus, Ohio.
In 1995, he moved to South Florida, and worked as a business reporter and editor of Medical Business newspaper. In Jan. 2002, he began with the Apalachicola Times, first as reporter and later as editor, and in Oct. 2020, also began editing the Port St. Joe Star.